The Sexual Avoidance Cycle Revisited: The Dangers of ‘Sexpectations’
Today we are going to revisit the Sexual Avoidance Cycle; more specifically, we are going to talk about the Disappointment Phase of the Cycle in order to pinpoint the harmful effects of expectations. That is, what happens when we have grand visions and plans for a sexual experience, and it falls below our expectation level? Continue reading “#47: Jessa – Expectations are the Problem”
Overcoming Sexual Shame
In her work, Sellers places considerable emphasis on reversing sexual shame in her clients’ and readers’ minds. Growing up in a sexually-open environment, with parents who were very transparent about sexual function, health, and education, Tina learned the importance of communication over the suppression of sexual fact. And by extension, she is a vocal opponent of abstinence-only techniques which are ineffective and detrimental to the overall sexual wellbeing of all who are involved.
Tina also likes to probe the depths of religious history to offer broader perspectives on how sexuality and religion can function symbiotically instead of antagonistically.
Without further ado, much more is expounded upon within the episode. It is an absolutely phenomenal experience, navigated by an equally phenomenal guest. Enjoy! Continue reading “#46: Dr. Tina Sellers – Sex, God, and the Conservative Church”
Parenting a trans teen
Pia is the mother of a transgender child (now twenty years old) who underwent a successful physical transition into his male self. Pia’s love for her kid and overall emotional resiliency shines through when she recounts the details of her child’s story.
An advocate of providing a strong support system for everyone undergoing surgery or hormone therapy to transition into the gender of their choice, she is a shining example of the warmth needed for everyone involved. Her story and perspective are extremely important. Continue reading “#45: Pia [Personal Story] – Parent of a Trans Teen”
The Guide to Getting It On: A Self-Published Phenomenon
If there was ever an excuse to self-publish a book, The Guide is a great example of how successful one can be using the practice. After Paul had taken nine years to finish the first draft of what would become The Guide To Getting It On, he wasn’t met with much success as he tried to get his work into circulation. Even a North Carolinian editor of a publishing house wagged his finger, saying that the subject matter would never fly; but ironically, years later, his book is being used as a central resource for sexual education for three college courses in North Carolina. Paul goes on to speak about the many iterations of the book–he even had to cut almost half of his draft to appease editors. He eventually self-published the book and the rest is history. And for the rest on the ever-changing forms and revisions, the book has undergone, tune into the episode. It is a great listen! Continue reading “#44: Paul Joannides – The Guide to Getting It On”
Our Body Image: Is it Environmentally Reinforced?
To start this episode, Jenny shares her fascination for the “etiology” (origin) of our body image. That is, when did we first become self-conscious about our bodies? Jenny states that she did over sixty interviews during the research stage of The Body Image Blueprint and the answer she found is fascinating. To learn of this central source, where most of our insecurities first become apparent, tune into the episode. Continue reading “#43: Jenny Berk – Body Image”
Using the Term “Cougar”
To start this episode, Suzanna talks about the negative connotations surrounding the title “cougar.” There are considerable allusions to predatory behavior when the term is brought up. Of course, Suzanna was well aware of this and after much deliberation, she decided to still include the oft-controversial “cougar” in the subtitle of her book, Revising Mrs. Robinson: Navigating Cougar-Cub Dating and Relationships. To find out the reason why tune into this very fascinating episode. Continue reading “#42: Suzanna Mathews – Cougar-Cub Relationships”
Basics of Matchmaking School
Listen in as Peggy describes her learning experience at the Matchmaking Institute of New York. What do you need to pay attention to when matchmaking? Peggy details that listening carefully during one-on-one sessions and making sure to take care of the business are essential. Continue reading “#41: Peggy Bennett – Matchmaking”
The Sexual Avoidance Cycle is far more common than many would believe, and I talk about this situation, what causes it and perpetuates its continuance.
I also answer the first of my listener questions during this “Soapbox” episode where I get to help you understand this important topic. Continue reading “#40: Jessa Zimmerman [Soapbox] – Sexual Avoidance Cycle”
A personal story of trauma and awakening
Listen to the story of Heather and her traumatic experiences which led to her transformative journey in her own life.
She grew up feeling like an outsider with feelings of inadequacy. Hear Heather describe her struggles that initially presented in her young life and how these difficulties led her into risk-taking situations to fit in. Continue reading “#39: Heather [Personal Story] – Sexual Trauma & Awakening”
Pornography – the good and the bad
Listen to the discussion of the role of Erotica and Pornography in a relationship and the positive and negative impacts.
What is the definition of pornography? Listen as Steven succinctly describes pornography and erotica and the overlapping interpretations of arousing materials. Hear the use and role of sex in regularly available cultural artifacts like magazines and videos. Continue reading “#38: Dr. Steven Davidson – Pornography”
Difficult conversations as an opportunity?
Challenge as an opportunity? Listen as Lara describes the context of conflict. She discusses how the components of assumption, judgment and expectation lead to a reaction. Continue reading “#37: Lara Currie – Difficult Conversations”
Evolutionary Psychology and Sex
In this episode, Rebecca tells us about Evolutionary Psychology, examining our roles and interactions through a biological and historical lens. Listen in as she compares our human proclivities to our great ape relatives. Continue reading “#36: Rebecca Coffey – Evolution and Sexual Behavior”
A personal story of sexual liberation
In this episode, I talk to Marina, who shares her personal journey from struggles with her self-image and a painful first sexual experience, to finally feeling liberated with a happier sex life.
The first time: a painful experience
As a teenager, Marina tells us that she struggled with self-image and was therefore excited when, at age sixteen, a “cool kid” from another school showed interest in her. Continue reading “#35: [Personal Story] Marina – Journey of Liberation”
History of Adam & Eve, A Sex Toy Retailer
Listen in as Katy discusses how Adam & Eve started out. She mentions it was just a thesis requirement to complete the founder Phil Harvey’s Master’s Degree. Continue reading “#34: Katie Zvolerin – Adam & Eve”
Dr. Laurie shares the reason behind why she wrote her book, Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters–And How to Get It. As a professor to over 150 students a year, she shares the influence her undergrad students had on this book.
Two factors that ultimately influenced her was the massive orgasm gap in men and women and the loss of clitoral knowledge. Listen as she tackles the miseducation that society is subjected to and uncovers some shocking orgasm statistics you don’t want to miss. Continue reading “#33: Dr. Laurie Mintz – The Orgasm Gap”
The Store: Darling Way
In this episode, Beth talks about how she started and founded the Darling Way after her 22-year marriage ended with a divorce. She shares how her shop started after an awful experience buying a lingerie for herself. Her store’s concept is about embracing the fact that it’s okay to be silly, fun, and excited or just a light-hearted approach to the serious topic of sexy fun. Continue reading “#32: Beth Liebling – Darling Way”
Recovering from people pleasing
Today's guest is sharing her story of claiming her story, rewriting her story, figuring out which parts she wants in, and which parts no longer serve her. Continue reading “#31: [Personal Story] Anca – A Recovering People Pleaser”
Polyamory – one version of consensual non-monogamy.
There are certainly plenty of people that choose an open relationship of one sort or another. Even though they're committed to each other, but by agreement, they are non-monogamous.
Often what we're referring to is people that have been committed and decide to change the arrangement and include other people in one way or another. Continue reading “#30: Tamara Powell – Polyamory”
Welcome to Better Sex. Today we are covering an important and pervasive topic. We're going to talk about female sexual pain, a woman's sexual pain. Way too many people struggle with painful conditions and most of them don't know what to do about it. Continue reading “#29: Maegan Megginson – Female Sexual Pain”
Today’s episode features Brodie Welch, a Chinese Medicine expert who helps us to recognize that from a Chinese medicine perspective, everything is energy, and sexual energy is an important subset of our total sum of energy reserves.
We cover how to apply all areas of the Chinese medicinal branches, the original body/mind/spirit medicine, into our lives and daily choices, “talking” and working with our organ systems to create balance. Continue reading “#28: Brodie Welch – Holistic Approaches to Libido”
Today’s personal story features Jenn, a 47-year-old woman who has undergone more than her fair share of stressful events during her life. From being molested as a child and losing her virginity to date rape, to facing repeated infertility issues, miscarriages and finally a hysterectomy.
We cover how all these events affected her relationship with herself, as well as her intimate relationships with others. Continue reading “#27: [Personal Story] Jenn – Trauma & Infertility, Fortunate Healing”
I mis-spoke in my introduction to the episode. Melissa is not yet certified as a sex therapist. I apologize for any confusion.
Sexual Fragmentation – what is it and how does it show up in sex therapy?
Tune in today to learn about how Melissa defines fragmentation as it applies to sex therapy work, as she talks about the competing needs we all have within us.
How do we get fragmented?
Melissa answers this question, discussing how our sexual and social development from a young age is impacted by loved ones and society, often creating a wedge between our minds and bodies. Continue reading “#26: Melissa Walker – Healing Our Sexual Fragmentation”
Amanda’s interest in menstrual health began as early as her childhood. Today she passionately shares her wisdom about how women should have knowledge of how their bodies work and, with this, feel empowered to talk about menstruation and sex without feeling ashamed. Continue reading “#25: Amanda Laird – Menstruation and Sexual Health”
What is self-care?
Tune in to hear Stacy’s definition of self-care: what it looks like and how it relates to all areas of life, not only with regards to physical health but mental and emotional health as well. Stacy reveals what percentage of health care issues come back to self-care, and talks about its relevance to everything from dental care and medical care to therapy. Continue reading “#24: Stacy Fisher-Gunn – The Importance of Self-Care”
What is pelvic floor physical therapy?
Dr. Fiacco kicks off by telling us exactly what pelvic floor physical therapy is; explaining about the basic musculature of the pelvic area and what kind of health issues can stem from this region, including some unexpected areas of the body that may present with problems that actually arise from the pelvis. Continue reading “#23: Dr. Serena Fiacco – Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy”