Stan Tatkin is the founder of A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy®(PACT). He has worked with couples for more than fifteen years in his clinical practice. He teaches, he counsels, he writes, he does it all!
Continue reading “#57: Stan Tatkin – We Do”
Stan has authored a few very important books throughout his career, some of them including: Wired for Love, Your Brain on Love, Wired for Dating, and his latest and the driving point behind this interview, We Do: Saying Yes to a Relationship of Depth, True Connection, and Enduring Love. All in all, I am delighted to have Stan on the show. You are really going to get a lot out of this talk!
The True Meaning of ‘Cliteracy’
Starting with a discussion of his book, She Comes First, Ian Kerner’s coined word ‘cliteracy’ is given more thought and emphasis. Overall, the term encapsulates the aim of his bestselling book. He relays to listeners his previously one-sided mentalities towards sex, his struggles, and his overall motivations for becoming “cliterate” (clitoral literacy). By moving past an intercourse-dominated understanding of what sex had been, and shifting towards an outercourse understanding of what sex could be, his life changed for the better. For more on the backstory and motivations for She Comes First, and his whole shift in perspective, check the episode out. Continue reading “#48: Ian Kerner – She Comes First”
Using the Term “Cougar”
To start this episode, Suzanna talks about the negative connotations surrounding the title “cougar.” There are considerable allusions to predatory behavior when the term is brought up. Of course, Suzanna was well aware of this and after much deliberation, she decided to still include the oft-controversial “cougar” in the subtitle of her book, Revising Mrs. Robinson: Navigating Cougar-Cub Dating and Relationships. To find out the reason why tune into this very fascinating episode. Continue reading “#42: Suzanna Mathews – Cougar-Cub Relationships”
Basics of Matchmaking School
Listen in as Peggy describes her learning experience at the Matchmaking Institute of New York. What do you need to pay attention to when matchmaking? Peggy details that listening carefully during one-on-one sessions and making sure to take care of the business are essential. Continue reading “#41: Peggy Bennett – Matchmaking”
Difficult conversations as an opportunity?
Challenge as an opportunity? Listen as Lara describes the context of conflict. She discusses how the components of assumption, judgment and expectation lead to a reaction. Continue reading “#37: Lara Currie – Difficult Conversations”
A personal story of sexual liberation
In this episode, I talk to Marina, who shares her personal journey from struggles with her self-image and a painful first sexual experience, to finally feeling liberated with a happier sex life.
The first time: a painful experience
As a teenager, Marina tells us that she struggled with self-image and was therefore excited when, at age sixteen, a “cool kid” from another school showed interest in her. Continue reading “#35: [Personal Story] Marina – Journey of Liberation”
The Store: Darling Way
In this episode, Beth talks about how she started and founded the Darling Way after her 22-year marriage ended with a divorce. She shares how her shop started after an awful experience buying a lingerie for herself. Her store’s concept is about embracing the fact that it’s okay to be silly, fun, and excited or just a light-hearted approach to the serious topic of sexy fun. Continue reading “#32: Beth Liebling – Darling Way”
Polyamory – one version of consensual non-monogamy.
There are certainly plenty of people that choose an open relationship of one sort or another. Even though they're committed to each other, but by agreement, they are non-monogamous.
Often what we're referring to is people that have been committed and decide to change the arrangement and include other people in one way or another. Continue reading “#30: Tamara Powell – Polyamory”
What is self-care?
Tune in to hear Stacy’s definition of self-care: what it looks like and how it relates to all areas of life, not only with regards to physical health but mental and emotional health as well. Stacy reveals what percentage of health care issues come back to self-care, and talks about its relevance to everything from dental care and medical care to therapy. Continue reading “#24: Stacy Fisher-Gunn – The Importance of Self-Care”
Frank was raised in a conservative home that placed a noose of fear and shame around sex. After a decade of fantasizing about sex, Frank married in his late 20’s and recalls the awkwardness about it. Sexuality was a very taboo topic in Frank's life and this carried into both his marriages.
Nancy had issues of her own as well. Being a victim of sexual abuse from the age of 5, Nancy felt dirty and ashamed as a child. Her first sexual experience made this worse and led to her having a reputation for being a tease and mastering manipulation to maintain her power. Continue reading “#21: [Personal Story] Nancy & Frank – A Perfect Storm”
Social Media is making sex obsolete.
Dr. Stephen Snyder shares a shocking statistic that reveals the drop in the sexual interaction between people. He unpacks his very interesting theory on why this is. In this episode, you will hear about why people have sex and the influence of social media and technology on their motivation to engage sexually.
Continue reading “#20: Dr. Stephen Snyder – Why Social Media is Making Sex Obsolete”
How important is passion?
The place of Love across cultures
In this episode of Better Sex, Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh unwraps her theory of love in two categories: submergent and emergent. She describes the difference between the two and how cultures have different expectations about love and passion. She dissects each journey and love cycle as people typically experience it. She shares an interesting find about successful couples having the foundation right, then letting the love emerge.
The question of love from friendship comes up. Tune in to learn what Dr. Sara thinks about this and what the defining factors are for a harmonious relationship.
Continue reading “#18: Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh – A New Perspective on Passion”
Men's sexual health concerns often stem from the pressure of expectations
In today’s episode, Jessa and Jennifer Valli talk about men’s sexual health concerns and dysfunctions (men being defined as people who have been raised male and who have a penis) and approaches to make sex easier and stress-free. Continue reading “#17: Jennifer Valli – Men's Sexual Concerns and Solutions”
Vino & Vulvas – A community conversation about sex
Today I am delighted to have Heather Edwards, who has been a pelvic physical therapist for 14 years and is currently completing the University of Michigan’s Certificate Program in Sex Counseling and Education.
In 2015 she founded Vino & Vulvas, an inclusive, public, monthly event that connects sexual health providers with community members through educational panel discussions about sexuality. Continue reading “#16: Heather Edwards – Vino and Vulvas”
Out of control sexual behavior or sex addiction
Are you concerned about your own sexual behavior in relation to your values?Do you wonder if your sexual behavior is out of control? Are you or someone you love worried that you have a sex addiction? You cannot afford to miss this episode with guest Marc Gilmartin. Marc is a Certified Sex Therapist and Licensed Mental Health Counselor who unpacks how to identify if you have a sexual behavior problem and how to deal with it. Continue reading “#14: Marc Gilmartin – Out of Control Sexual Behavior & Erotic Conflict”
I'm excited about the topic for this episode. We're going to be talking about both Masculine and Feminine Energy. I'm talking about this because it's relevant to sex and to our lives in general. Continue reading “#13: Jeni Dahn – Energy and Sex”
Well, the last episode of my podcast was about pregnancy and sexuality, and it seemed to make sense to go right into the next obvious topic, which is postpartum sexuality.
Talk about a lot of change to adjust to! You've got not only the physical impact of carrying and birthing a baby, but you've got the emotional, the psychological, and the relational impacts as well. Life is not the same once you've had a baby. It's a complex time with a lot of changes and challenges. Continue reading “#11: Tammy Senn – Postpartum Sexuality, Listen to Your Body”
Today's topic is pregnancy and sexuality. It's just not talked about very often, and if you have been pregnant or if you have been a partner with somebody that's pregnant, you may have noticed that the doctors often don't ask or talk about sex. Continue reading “#10: Aleece Fosnight – Pregnancy and Sexuality, How to Enhance and What to Avoid”
I give a lot of thought to what makes a great sex life. What makes us sex life healthy, what makes it enjoyable for people, what makes it fulfilling?
When I consider the kinds of things that matter, I think about the ability to slow down and be present in the moment. I think about the ability to tune into your body and to know what you want in that moment. Not just abstractly, like if I asked you at breakfast what you wanted for dinner, but what do you want right now? Continue reading “#9: Anna Joy Reedy – Platonic Cuddling and Healing Touch Therapy”
I often hear from clients about how much they struggle when they're different from each other. In the beginning, we were attracted to this other way of being. We were interested because this person was so different from us. But what intrigued us in the beginning is what often drives us nuts later in the relationship. So even though opposites attract, they can run into misunderstanding and frustration later. Continue reading “#8: Jessica Butts – Do Opposites Attract? How Different Personality Types Affect Your Sex Life”
As I was putting the podcast together, I put out a little survey to my subscribers asking what kinds of topics people wanted me to cover. While it is not the most frequent presenting concern in my practice, the most frequent request I got in terms of what to talk about on the show was menopause. Continue reading “#7: Dr. Stephanie Ring – Menopause: Understanding the Inevitable”
So why is today's show about sex therapy? Well, because I'm a certified sex therapist and I know that a lot of people listening don't know what that means. There is confusion about what sex therapy is and what a sex therapist does. Continue reading “#6: Sallie Foley – Sex Therapy: What is it?”
Tantra offers a lot of gifts. It can help you be present. It can increase your sense of connection. It can lead you to a greater understanding of who you are in your physical body. Continue reading “#5: Matthias Rose – Tantra, A Beautiful Integration of Personal Strength, Sexual Power, and Emotional Connection”
What are we talking about? Men who have sex with men, have done it in the past or who are interested in it, but still identify as straight or mostly straight. However, their behavior or their interest makes their partner wonder about their sexuality. Continue reading “#4: Dr. Joe Kort – “Is My Husband Gay?” | Male Sexual Fluidity”
Shame. We're not born with it but it is given to us at a very early age. And we unwittingly pass it along to others. Continue reading “#3: Parke Burgess – The Virus Known As Shame”